DESI JOKES

Musharraf in Tunnel:

Vajpayee, Musharraf, Madhuri Dixit and Margaret Thatcher are traveling in a train. The train suddenly goes through a tunnel and it gets completely dark. Suddenly there is a kissing sound and then a slap! The train comes out of the tunnel. Thatcher and Vajpayee are sitting there looking perplexed. Musharraf is bent over holding his face, which is red from an apparent slap. All of them remain diplomatic and nobody says anything.

Thatcher is thinking: "These Pakistanis are all crazy after Madhuri. Musharraf must have tried to kiss her in the tunnel. Very proper that she slapped him"

Madhuri is thinking: "Musharraf must have moved to kiss me, and kissed Margaret instead and got slapped."

Musharraf is thinking: "Damn! it, Vajpayee must have tried to kiss Madhuri, she thought it was me and slapped! me."

Vajpayee is thinking: "If this train goes through another tunnel, I could make another kissing sound and slap Musharraf again."


Gandhiji Joke

God asked Lal Bahadur Shastri how many children he had during his time on earth. He replied saying he had three! Happy with the relatively good family planning adopted, God gave Shastri a Mercedes!

Subhash Chandra Bose is asked the same question. When he replies he had 10 children, God is a bit upset and gives him a cheaper car, the Ford.

Jawaharlal is next. He decides to see what happens if he says he had 15 children, God is pretty angry and gives him an inexpensive Maruti.

Sometime later the three see Mahatma Gandhi returning on foot. They ask why God hadn't given him anything. Gandhiji replied with anger, "Some idiot told God that I was the FATHER OF THE NATION!"

Laloo's Son Marriage

Laloo Prasad Yadav talks to his son.
Laloo: I want you to marry a girl of my choice
Son : "I want to choose my own bride".
Laloo : "But the girl is Ambani's daughter."
Son : "Well, in that case...... Yes"

Next Laloo approaches Mukesh Ambani
Laloo : "I have a husband for your daughter."
Ambani : "But my daughter is too young to marry."
Laloo : "But this young man is a vice-president of the World Bank."
Ambani : "Ah, in that case.....Yes"

Finally Laloo goes to see the President of the World Bank.
Laloo : "I have a young man to be recommended as a vice-president."
President :"But I already have more vice-presidents than I need."
Laloo : "But this young man is Ambani's son-in-law."
President : "Ah, in that case.......Yes."
This is how business is done!!!

Gujarati Joke
Q) Why won't the gujju jeweler sell anything to the UP ka bhayiya?
A) The bhayiya kept giving gujju a bunch of hair each time the gujju asked for KESH.

Q) What will a Gujju tell a tomato, coming last in a tomato race? (in case of one)
A) Tomato KETCHUP.

Q) Why did the gujju go to Rome ?
A) He wanted to listen to POPE music.

Q) Why did the gujju go to London?
A) To see BIG BEHN.

Q) What did the Gujju mean when he said, "Ramesh no dikro STATES ma gayon" ?
A) Ramesh's son failed in statistics...

Q) What did the Gujju say to the singing prostitute?
A) You are going from BED To VERSE.

Q) Did you know that Gujarati students are going to start a fraternity?
A) They named it Rho Beta Rho.

Q) Why did the gujjus take 50 paise when they went to watch "GANDHI"?
A) They read Atten( 8 annas)-bourough in the credits.

Q) Why did the gujju think Gandhi was acted by a woman in "GANDHI"?
A) They read Ben( behn) Kingsley did the acting.